Maggots!

Oh, Where oh Where, can my taxes be.....the decay took them away from me.

Adolf and I are in the process of buying a home...again! You would think, that I would have learned a few things from the first-go-round....NOT.

I've spent the better part of the day on a futile quest to track down 3 years of tax returns for the kind man at the bank.

Picture this..if you will..

Me, on my hands and knees, on a freezing cement floor, wading in a stinking, decaying, dark and damp basement digging through 10 years of shit! WHAT KIND OF IDIOTS KEEP, ALL OF THIS CRAP?

After numerous bouts of hysterics, outcries of obscenities, and annihilating a trinket or two, by smashing them against the far wall...I came across, what looked like a box of important papers. HALLELUJAH!!!!

I reach in, with high hopes....I pull out piles of greenish-black, sodden, festering bits of decomposing paper, teeming with maggots and mold. ARRGGHHHHH!!!!

I jump up and down, like the imbecile, that I am, screaming and flapping my arms , all the while shreeking...Fuck, Fuck Fuck!!!!

I HATE MAGGOTS! They creep me out!

Now, here is where, living out in the country, comes in handy. Because with all certainty, if I had, had any neighbors, they would have surely, had me hauled out in a straight jacket, right there on the spot.

Moral of the story: Stop renting old ass houses!